Reluctantly getting fit.

I have been slowly working on a weight-loss journey. Yes, again. :P

The Tracy Anderson program didn’t really seem to work for me last summer. I haven’t given up on the Tracy Anderson, but I think she’s far more advanced than what I’m ready for. So I’ve been working on starting smaller. Sure, I would love to work out an hour a day, 6 days a week, high-intensity interval training, etc etc. But I’m starting at zero. The exercise I have gotten over the past several years has been negligible at best. I am weak. (Physically, not mentally?) I need to build up my strength and endurance if my workouts aren’t going to just make me wish I was dead the whole time. I want everything to be more effective. I want that “metabolism” thing I hear people talk about but have never experienced myself!

I’ve been starting with 20 minute workouts. An hour seems like foreverrrrr, but 20 minutes? That’s nothing at all. I can totally do that. I did walking on the treadmill for the first month or so. I have since moved on to the elliptical. I try to go 6 days a week, but I think that only actually happened 1 week, lol. So the goal is “more days of the week than not.” So, at least 4. After the first several weeks, I decided to add weight training. Since I am so weak from years of inactivity, it was a smart step. Can’t expect my workouts to be much good if I’m not very strong. So the goal is 4 days of cardio and 3 days of weights (with Saturday being the day I do both, Sunday no workouts). MWFSa cardio, TThSa weights. Again, doesn’t often happen that way, so if I can even do MWF cardio and TTh weights, I still consider it a win.

Any progress is a win. I try to remember that.

I do my workouts in the mornings before work. Yes, getting up earlier than I “have to” suxxxxxxxx. But when I tried to do evening workouts, they never happened. I’d find excuses. I’m too tired from being at work all day. I’ll do it tomorrow. I have plans. It’s much easier to find excuses when you have a whole day to think them up! And dreading a workout all day is also no fun. But when I get up and do it right away in the morning, I don’t have time to think up excuses. I don’t have time to dread it. Allegedly, I have kickstarted my energy and metabolism for the day. I do feel more “awake” if I’ve worked out in the morning than when I haven’t.

Been working on my eating too. If there’s any truth to “80% nutrition, 20% exercise” rule of losing weight, I can’t forget food. I’m watching calories with myfitnesspal. My goal right now is to stay under 1600 calories a day. Seems like a lot, even to me, but when I had lower calorie goals I never stayed within them. And it is disheartening. It is demotivating to feel like you’re constantly failing. So I upped the calories to a more reasonable goal, with the intention of lowering that number as I make progress. (If I make progress?)

Added a lot more fruit into my diet. Before, I’d have almost none. Now I’m trying to have my snacks and desserts be almost exclusively fruits. Strawberries, apples, grapes, and clementines are my favorites. I try to alternate them week by week. As I get sick of eating one kind, I swap it out for another. Lots of Kashi GoLean bars for snacks as well. I’ve been having Greek yogurt as breakfast for years, but I’ve added granola with lots of fiber now. I’ve been eating a lot of Lean Cuisines for lunch and dinner. Which feels like cheating the whole “eating clean” if I’m consuming frozen dinners, but they still feel like a step in the right direction. They make counting the calories significantly easier. They make portion control easier. Right now, I need easy. If I get discouraged, I could derail this whole thing. Which is what always happens.

Also been using Tumblr for “fitspiration”. I started my own “fitblr”, Reluctant Fitness. Mostly I just repost things I find motivating (I love before-and-afters), and some mocking of the bullshit motivational stuff (sweat is not your fat crying, you idiot). And other things that I find motivating on a realistic level. Getting fit fucking sucks, yo. Let’s not paint it up like it doesn’t.

xo Ang

Published Wednesday, January 30, 2013 | 5 Comments

I’m a Malifool and need to relax.

It appears I’m neglecting this blog in favor of my new-ish gaming blog, Play. About a month ago, the boyfriend and I began playing Malifaux, which has snowball into quite the addiction and obsession on my part. :) Not sorry! But yeah, among collecting more masters, reading the fluff, learning more about playing my favorite (Lilith), learning to play Warhammer 40k, LOTROing as often as I can, and not to mention coming up with a character for a game of Pathfinder that we’ll be starting soon (think D&D)… gaming has pretty much overtaken all my not-at-work time and attention! The boyfriend could not be happier (no really, I think he realizes that he hit the jackpot with me).

I’m doing well, overall, I suppose. Besides siphoning all my money into my new Malifaux obsession and feeling the financial crunch, that is. :oops:  Work is going pretty well. I went through a rough patch due to some changes, but I think we’ve worked it out now. I’m not thrilled about being at the office until 7pm most nights, but I guess it could always be worse. I am adaptable.

My weight loss has pretty much ceased, lol. I will be working (again) on trying to find the motivation and willpower and watch what I eat a bit better than I have been. I think calorie consumption is something I will be able to have better control of and consistency with than trying to scratch out time and energy to exercise with any regularity. Both are ideal, yes. But I’ll do what I can. I’m trying to relax about the whole thing since it was really just stressing me out and making me angry with myself no matter what I was eating or not eating and all that. Which just makes a girl want to shove more garbage into her mouth! Anytime in the past that I’ve sort of lost any weight was when I said “fuck it” and just tried to eat things in moderation and not beat myself up over everything.

xo Ang

Published Friday, October 5, 2012 | Leave a Comment

I’m so bad!

Oy. I have fallen off the fitness wagon and can’t seem to get back onto it! Can I wait for it to circle back around and pick me up?

I don’t think I’ve worked out for like 3 weeks now. Work stress and long hours I think is what started the descent of motivation. My diet went pretty badly last week when I drove from Virginia to Minnesota (the drives especially, 20 hours!—but thankfully the junk food made me sick so I’m still not craving it!). I’m only about half back on the diet wagon. For the most part since the beginning I’ve been good with eating sensibly and keeping around 1200 calories a day. With the exception of last week. ;)

I’m getting better about eating and trying to get back to the 1200 a day. But it’s been a struggle. Must keep the bad food out of the house! Resist the restaurants! Make sure I get plenty to eat for breakfast (turkey bacon and blueberries or Greek yogurt) so I’m not hungry. Kashi Go Lean bars have been my meal substitute of choice. I usually have my breakfast and then space out 3 Kashi bars during the day then have a dinner of some baked chicken and salad or something like that.

I just can’t seem to get back to the exercise though! Just the thought makes me want to take a nap. But I suppose that’s what willpower and whatnot are for. Where does one get some willpower? Target? I think it would help me if I watched the Metamorphosis intro again to get me motivated. I had lost 15 lbs in just a few weeks! Thankfully I’ve only gained 3 back. But still, that’s not good. I can do it! Ugh. Get back into it, Ang!

 

What’s this about? I’m doing the Tracy Anderson Metamorphosis (Omnicentric) program. Check out the Tracy Anderson tag to read more about my journey.

xo Ang

Published Tuesday, August 21, 2012 | 4 Comments